Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Before he speak his suit bespoke II

From this morning's news:

Thirty-three new recruits were sworn in as members of the Vatican's elite Swiss Guard on Tuesday. The Swiss Guard, founded in 1506, consists of 100 volunteers who must be male, Swiss, Catholic, single, at least 5-foot-8, and beardless.

They forgot "cut" and "into clergy," didn't they? Or does that go without saying?

ADDED: In other (belated) religious news, the Pope abolished Limbo, y'all! If I was one of those unbaptized dead babies, I'd be pissed. I waited all this time for nothing? A dead baby's time is important, too! Fuck.


Mel said...

Oh, I'm pretty sure they're not cut. Too Jewish.

Not so surreptitious photos of a particularly hot one are among my best memories of Rome.

Michael said...

You might be right, Mel. Funny, but "Swiss" says "circumcised" to me.

As for the photo, me, too! I'll have to see if I can find mine to post up in here.

Frontier Psychiatrist said...

I also developed a crush on a Swiss Guard when I was there.


Michael said...

OMG, they're gay icons! Just like Tori Spelling (thinks she is).

Frontier Psychiatrist said...

No more Limbo? Questionable move on the Pope's part. Logically, if you have original sin, you need Limbo.


Michael said...

Except there's still Purgatory, which is purported to be nastier than Limbo, though certainly not Hell. Limbo was mostly for dead babies not yet purged of Original Sin.

Imagine going to Heaven right now. That baby backlog must be a nightmare. The US Passport Office thinks they have it bad?

Now I'm wondering if non-Catholic dead babies get in, too.

James H said...

Actually the Pope did not abolish Limbo. Limbo actually was nnever an official doctrine of the Church and was basically theological spectualtion. One though is still free to belive or not in Limbo

Michael said...

Or correct spelling, apparently.

This Limbo stuff is all in good fun, James. Unlike, say, the Church's policy on condom use in Africa.

Jane said...

Michael, just delurking to say you are really funny. Thanks for helping me through my incredibly boring days.

Michael said...

Hi, Jane! And thanks.

Why so bored? Have you tried bursting into song? I find that can help. Lately I've been doing "I'm Not Wearing Underpants Today!" from Avenue Q.

The Other Andrew said...

No mention of the outfits?! I love the Swiss Guard, and those outfits are gayer than a box of songbirds.

And yes, given that they are European I'd say it's a dead cert that they all have turtlenecks.

Michael said...

The title was a nod to the outfits, right?

So European=au naturale? I didn't know.

Suddenly I'm missing mine.

Ur-spo said...

i dislike the 'beardless' requirement - another slur against whiskers.