Friday, December 23, 2005
Wednesday, December 21, 2005
Added: While I was typing this, Kenny Loggins started singing Celebrate Me Home. That's in my Christmas mix. It makes me warm. Sometimes it makes me cry a bit. Like this time.
Tuesday, December 20, 2005
Tangentially, concerning the ongoing 'Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays' non-debate, my boy Tom has an interesting anecdote to share. It's good and I'm not just saying that because of, you know, the mad crush. Check it out, y'all. As with people of different stripes and persuasions, there is a time and a place for all these expressions, right? Is anyone honestly trying to argue that? Of course not. It's a manufactured controversy once again casting the poor conservative religious types in the role of the beleaguered. Ridiculous. They're so downtrodden that I feel I should send them their Christmas greetings a few days early. A pick me up for them. And me. And you. Who can argue with it?
Friday, December 16, 2005
So before y'all start making hetero jokes, I'll add that there is a fucking Matthew McConaughey FEST going on over at Just Jared. Have at it, bitches.
Can it be MEAT FRIDAY again already? I've often admitted that I'm not too proud for sloppy seconds, so despite my tastes normally running more towards man than boy, I can certainly appreciate the charms of these Survivor scraps. I'm flexible like dat. (This one's for you, Bodes)
photo by Lewis Payton via towleroad
- MOVIES: Yeah, of course I'm gonna see Brokeback Mountain. When it finally gets here, that is. I'm guessing I may have to drive a few hundred miles and possibly cross state lines. That's not the movie I'm thinking about today. It's The New World. I love the trailer for this flick and I'm fascinated by the time period. Plus, hello(!), Pocahontas. She's played by Q'orianka Kilcher. This hot bitch is distant cousins with Jewel. How did I miss this? They're practically identical, Patty-and-Cathy-stizz! I'll check this out despite The Thin Red Line. I know that Malick is considered a genius, but I found that nearly unwatchable. What did that floppy bird mean anyway? I'm also gonna see The Squid and the Whale, Syriana, Good Night and Good Luck and King Kong. It seemed like months since there was anything I wanted to see, and now they are piling up.
- TV: Only three more weeks until 24 people! They are adding to the cast, almost daily it seems. We have Laurie Metcalf and Stephen Spinella now. Also Sean Astin, Jean Smart, Peter Weller, JoBeth Williams and Julian Sands. Damn. The truth is I'd trade them all if only they'd give me Dina Araz (Shoreh Aghdashloo) back. Behroooz! Boy, that never gets old, does it? Here's a little snippet from USA Today: The new season picks up 18 months after May's finale. Let's hope Jack has enjoyed that year-and-a-half, because odds are he's about to face another very bad day. Hell yeah!
- MUSIC: Dolly is up for a Golden Globe, guys, and she's tickled about it. It's for her song Travelin' Thru which she wrote for the movie Transamerica. Turns out Dolly employs a transgendered individual. Trannies, gays, Midwestern tourists in jean shorts and white sneaks....she loves us all! Plus she's basically a drag queen herself. She's nearly perfect. As evidence, here's a snippet from that interview: Parton told us you don't have to know the song is about a transsexual to like it. Given its Christian imagery, she said, "country fans may think it's gospel".
I haven't even gotten to books and the internets, but I have to get to the gym. Even though this media stuff pleases me, it's short-lived. But one more inch onto my chest and one subtracted from my waist will make me happy forever.
Man, I had a horrendous day at work yesterday. We had six inches of snow in the morning. Around these parts, that grinds things to a halt. I work in a customer service job and not many folks were out and about. Some were, though, so I was here for 10 hours anyway. I was tired and bored and cranky when I got home to find that my cable was down. No television, no internet. What the fuck am I supposed to do? So frustrating. I felt much better after pulling myself off and I sat down with my big red and green salad to watch Martha Stewart cook a savory escarole and meatball soup with Il Divo. Oh, shutup. I did it in a manly fashion.
P.S. I'm not a Martha lover like some of y'all, but I do appreciate what you see in her. However, she should NEVER be allowed to do interviews. Horrid. I would have muted her, but I really did want to hear about that soup.
Added: The television came back while I was otherwise amused/occupied, but the internet never did.
Thursday, December 15, 2005
Wednesday, December 14, 2005
Yeah, there's Shanghai or Sydney, but maybe Rio, eh? Yeah, it's still two days until Meat Friday. Fucking sue me. How long would you spend around and between those quads, man? Damn, I could live down there.
picture by Lewis Payton via towleroad
Added: On an unrelated note, if you didn't catch GayWatch on The Daily Show, here's where you can check it out (video nsfw). That reminds me. I need to renew my subscription to Gaywad McGee's Scrotum Lovers Quarterly.
- There will be no abs for Christmas, but you already knew that. As I told you, the effort has nonetheless proved fruitful. I've reached the lean end of my closet already, so what's next but for me to buy all new pants? Yay! I thought abs would be easier. If you knew how old I really am, you'd be more sympathetic to my plight. But I haven't given up. Instead of Christmas, I'm now planning on giving myself abs for Purim, which is still appropriate with Esther's fast and whatnot. To that end, I've resolved to limit myself to one handful of nuts per day.
- I've been sharing some Christmas music with a few of my favorite bitches. While I can't host songs on this chintzy blog like freakgirl is so generously doing on hers, if you are a ho for the ho-ho-ho like I am, send me a note and I'll include you in the yule goodness via email.
- I mentioned a while back that my beloved niece was hoping for All-American status for the cross country season. She got it! She's now one of only two girls in her school's history to get that in their first two years of competition. Tough as nails, that one.
- I was feeling a little down earlier today, but I'm feeling OK now. And more sleek.
- You know I've been jonesing for some travel. I booked some time out West for skiing, but that's not til Easter. My friends bailed on Australia, but I'm still considering it. Another friend just found out he's moving to Shanghai for at least a year! I've always threatened to learn Chinese (beyond "Where's the bathroom?" ,"Thank you", "I'm hungry" and "Dude, you're hot", so what better excuse? Will I have to blow someone to get that visa? No? You sure?
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
- Second guessing myself on the gift I had for OtherMom, I headed for the upscale mall, which is so chic btw, that it's not a mall at all, but a 'collection'. Heh. Not surprisingly (to me), I ended up shopping for myself. I couldn't believe, given the hour and the proximity to Christmas, that the crowd was minimal. It was nice and relaxing to roam around and window shop and try stuff on. See, all you girls need your very own homo homey for this reason alone. I'll watch you try shit on for a very long time before I even think of getting restless. Some other folks seemed a bit stressed, though, like the parents waiting in line with toddlers in tow for pictures with Santa. One little boy in his mini-Santa suit had a particularly furrow-browed DILF behind him. I decided to intervene and commented about how freakin' adorable the boy was and what a great memory this would be for them both. The DILF just lit up. Beamed. Stress lines vanished. It's Christmas, y'all!
- I worked out later. I usually hit the gym when I'm up there. This time I was a little bored and unmotivated. Then I saw Gaylord. Tall. Fucking BUILT. Bangin' ass. Black as coal. Total homo. I gathered he was a personal trainer, so I asked him to take me on with no appointment. It's the end of the day + I'll pay him under the table = He obliged. Me under the table, paying. Unnnhhh. Damn, I've never worked so hard. Was he that tough or was I just that desperate to please him? I can smell him still. Anyway, the gym was closing and we were in the locker room after. I couldn't help but stare at his ass. Would you believe he noticed and then let me hold it? The tip was generous.
- I spent a fair amount of time regretting that I came off as some kind of apologist for Ford over at freakgirl.com. I asked a few questions about what we should expect of a corporation. Upon further reflection, I think that we SHOULD expect companies to put civil rights ahead of fiscal concerns. That's why I like her joint. So very funny most of the time, but then suddenly, I learn something! If she posted more photos of hot guys, it'd be damn near perfect over there.
- Mom2 ended up LOVING her gift (a hand-thrown teapot with all her FAVE colors). Well, I'm guessing she loved it given that when we left the restaurant she frenched me a little. I know what you're thinking. Gross! Before you judge though, you should know that she's got a tight lil' chassis for a 65 year old. And a mom. What? She's not my real mom.
What else? Oh, I could go on. I love my family up there. The rest of the weekend was talking over coffee and breakfast, talking over lunch, talking over dinner, talking while we drove places, talking in the sauna. These Jews love to talk. About THINGS. REAL THINGS. I think I was switched at birth and should have been with them all along. One more thing. In this little recap, there's one lie. Care to guess?
Added: Sight seen, maybe boyfriends for just a few weeks and then we become really good friends after.
It's good, huh? Anyone know her?
I went out into the hall and leaned over the banister, just enough to see without being seen. She was still on the stairs, now she reached the landing, and the ragbag colors of her boy's hair, tawny streaks, strands of albino-blond and yellow, caught the hall light. It was a warm evening, nearly summer, and she wore a slim cool black dress, black sandals, a pearl choker. For all her chic thinness, she had an almost breakfast-cereal air of health, a soap and lemon cleanness, a rough pink darkening in the cheeks. Her mouth was large, her nose upturned. A pair of dark glasses blotted out her eyes. It was a face beyond childhood, yet this side of belonging to a woman. I thought her anywhere between sixteen and thirty; as it turned out, she was shy two months of her nineteenth birthday.
Friday, December 09, 2005
I think both of these two were gettin' some Sweet Charity (read: dick) on the side. He is a butt pirate, right? I know the picture above is my boy, Jonathan, but I'm skeptical that's him pictured below. However, that morsel came up when I googled him (multiple times), so I thought I'd include it. You know, in the interest of full disclosure. Happy Meat Friday, y'all!
Thursday, December 08, 2005
PS Yeah, I know, the photo's not high art, but whaddya want when I'm standing on my front stoop in pj's and bare feet in the snow at midnight?
Ann Coulter cut short her speech at UConn the other day, unable to continue over the noise of hecklers. She instead went straight into a Q & A session, after snarking, "I love to engage in repartee with people that are a lot stupider than I am." Here's a sample of this woman's bile:
- When asked what she'd do if she ever had a child who came out as gay, she replied, "I'd say, "Did I ever tell you you're adopted?""
- She called US Senator Barbara Boxer a great candidate for Democrats "because she is a woman and learning disabled."
- She limped out this old one, too: "If the Democrats want to stick to the middle of the road, why did they pick Ted Kennedy. Didn't he have some trouble sticking to the middle of the road?"
I'm not convinced she believes half the shit she says. Some of this hate she spews is because it pads her bank account if she's provocative. In my mind, that's almost worse because she incites people all too willing to have someone give voice to their bigotry.
link via towleroad
Wednesday, December 07, 2005
photo via Bent
Cal Thomas and Bob Beckel propose a public debate on the scientific merits of intelligent design, and Beckel wonders whether "the Darwinists will show up." You bet we will! In fact, we'll host. We challenge the top "intelligent-designists" to a debate of the scientific evidence for intelligent design, to be held at Case Western Reserve University in Cleveland the first week of January. "Doubting Thomas" Cal's nihilistic suggestion to subject the Bible to scientific analysis is too big a project for this event, but an hour or so sounds like just about how long it should take to dispatch any scientific claims for intelligent design. The question is, will the designists show? Calls go out every day to present scientific data at scientific conferences. The designists are always busy that decade. Meanwhile, the scientific data supporting evolution continue to pour in on a daily basis and produce spinoff applications that create new medicine, more productive crops, cleaner water and better living for billions of people worldwide. The Darwinists show up to work every day in thousands of labs around the globe. Mr. Thomas and Mr. Beckel, your guys are the ones who don't show. January. Cleveland. The "science" of ID. Put up or shut up.
Patricia Princehouse, Department of Biology, Case Western
Reserve University, Cleveland
You go, Patty! Throw that gauntlet DOWN, baby!
- If you accidentally set the microwave to 50 minutes instead of five minutes, and then start reading freakgirl and don't notice that it's running and running and running, after 15 minutes or so twelve oz. of broccoli and cauliflower will dessicate down to the volume and consistency of a healthy loogy. Did I eat it anyway?
- Nearly everyone has mad love for the iPod, but mine grows daily deeper when he shuffles through all my Christmas tunes and pipes them throughout the house (and yard!). Until now, I never realized that I have 205 holiday morsels. You heard me.
- Call me cynical but I tend to fall on the other side of Phoebe in the 'no truly altruistic act' debate. I brought many bags of non-perishable food items to the local St. Vincent de Paul's mission because it makes me feel good. Is it still a good thing if only some of my reasons are virtuous? I know some of y'all won't like a Catholic organization, but the food goes directly to the homeless and hungry in our own community.
- Speaking of Catholic things, over the weekend my niece (8 y.o) was questioning the existence of St. Nicholas. For those unfamiliar, St. Nicholas brings presents on Dec. 6 to all the good lil' girls and boys, provided they are acolytes of the holy and apostolic church, of course. Niece thinks he's dead and her Mom is providin'' the swag. Astute, I say. I mentioned this to a dude at work. He reported that when his son asked who St. Nick is, he told him, "He's Santa's poorer brother. That's why the presents aren't as good. And instead of a sleigh, St. Nick rides around in a rusted out van, so be on the lookout for him." The kid is five! That's hilarious/borderline abusive, no? Now, in my head, St. Nick looks like Chris Farley.
- Over the weekend, I saw Rent. Again. I liked it even better the second time. Hence the last few post titles have only a tenuous (at best) connection with the content. They're just what I'm singing in my head. Later, I went to Linens-N-Things, despite the fact that I despise how they spell their name. I was in Nate's section, surrounded by all his products and all those large head shots of him and his perfect hair and pristine complexion, and jesus help me, I swooned. Laid right down on one of his beds for a second. Now that's a faggy evening, Randy, no matter how you slice it. I bought towels. Why won't he offer the duvet I want in queen size? Anyone care to bite on that one?
- You know I'm gay, right? I'm not bi. And I'm certainly not questioning. Still, a few times last night during the Victoria's Secret thing I found myself thinking, "Damn, I'd really like to bury it in her." Thoughts?
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
Also, hats off to the marketing folks at Victoria's Secret. Not content with merely a stranglehold on the straight folks and lesbians, they've seen fit to add both Ricky Martin AND Seal to the show. ::golf claps:: Ya got me.
ADDED: I can't believe I failed to mention one of the coolest things about X-Men 3. Shohreh Aghdashloo is in it! Behroooooooooooz!
Monday, December 05, 2005
I should admit that I mainly read this because of Oprah and Bodhi, but Nate did say he loved it, too, so I wasn't thanking him ONLY because he's so pretty. Who all clicked on his link? There's a nice story about him in USA Today, but it won't last long, so get him while he's hot.
Now I'm on to Magical Thinking by Augusten Burroughs. I've read all his other stuff, so I'm sure this'll be great. I mean, freakgirl said so. Also, thanks tothe aforementioned Mr. Frey, I'll be carrying the Tao Te Ching around for the next few months at least.
I mock Yellow Springs a bit, but this is a really cool town. Evidence is that they have made the first official declaration by a government entity against Ohio's recent amendment banning gay marriage.
The resolution says the amendment passed in November as Issue 1 is “against village practices and policies of inclusiveness and non-discrimination” because it threatens the rights of all unmarried couples and creates “an overall milieu if anguish and doubt as to the abilities of same-sex couples to provide for each other and their children.”Issue 1 (the gay marriage ban) was defeated in Yellow Springs 2,238 to 408. Of course, the statewide results were considerably different.
I snapped the picture of the historic train station with my phone. The station is a little visitor's bureau now. Can you tell I loved this town? Jen, there is a fabulous little Craftsman bungalow we can have for a song!
news link via Gay People's Chronicle
Sunday, December 04, 2005
What does God expect of us? To do justice. To love kindness. Nancy and I have been married for nearly 33 years. We’re pro-life. We believe that we have to do all that we can to advocate the protection of all life. We believe that marriage is a sacred bond between a man and a woman, that allows for families to develop, to become the basic foundation of our society. Our worship and our faith give me the opportunity to make decisions that are more effective for people. Jim Petro for Governor.
Saddest part is that this shit will probably work. Fuck. Get me outta here.
commercial transcript via Faggoty-Ass Faggot
cartoon is from the Dayton Daily News/Mike Peters
Friday, December 02, 2005
They make our cars, so why not mix our Appletinis? In a tentative step toward a future they've been promising us since the 70's (at least), ladies and gentleman, I'd like to introduce you to RoboBar, your android bartender. It's kinda cool, no question, but I'll have to check with Max to see if it's so tomorrow. My sister works for the company that is making these, so she'll be partly responsible when, inevitably, they go all CRUSH! KILL! DESTROY! on our asses.
Added: For 200 G you can have this bitch in your rumpus room. Bets on how long til it shows up on Cribs?
Thursday, December 01, 2005
PS I had a third nipple picture handy, freakgirl.
December 1 is World AIDS Day. It has been for 18 years now. People live a lot longer with AIDS than they used to. Still, a stunning number of people are dying. 3 million people a year—an average of 5.7 deaths every minute of every day. Lots of things to read about today on the successes and failures in fighting this disease over the last decades. I've never lost friends to AIDS. I've barely known people with AIDS. For someone with a different perspective, y'all should check out what this dude has written. I read his blog often. He's a smart and funny faggot (a) with some astute observations. In spite of those qualities, he's also from Ohio (b), y'all! Before him, I'd always thought that was a Venn diagram with no intersection (c), yo. Holla Cleveland!