Tuesday, February 06, 2007

Should I bend over, should I look older, just to be put on the shelf?

Couple questions. First, is it ever appropriate to get a raging boner in an art venue? Remember when I went to that contemporary dance performance on Saturday? And my favorite Banana Republic salesmorsel was a performer? I know it's art and all and it's supposed to elevate one's sensibilities, but there was a certain vignette where, but for a flesh-toned thong, he was naked (and his body...boys, his body is art) and two women painted his flesh with vibrant colors and then lay him down on a blank canvas, after which the canvas was raised with the impression left by his form.....well, it's a good thing that I was seated in back because it was either stand and adjust or....or....well, there was no "or". I had to stand. Is that OK as long as I was emotionally and intellectually stimulated as well?

This next one is more serious. I had left plenty of time to get to that performance, but didn't count on an accident on I-70, so I was left scrambling for a parking space and then running through the bitter cold and wind so as not to be (more) late for the show. Up the sidewalk a ways, and struggling more mightily than I, was a diminutive young woman (less than a meter tall) on a non-motorized scooter. What's the etiquette in that situation? She was barely moving against the wind, and undoubtedly trying to make the opening curtain as I was. Would it have been rude to offer her assistance? I mean, she was fully capable, just very slow. As it was I muttered something about the verchacte cold and just blew by, feeling horrible. Thoughts?

14 comments:

q60sgirl said...

Oohhh painting on the flesh. A DVD i simply must have the Pillowbook, or something. I want to be painted on. I do.

Chaucer's Bitch said...

Pillowbook rocks. Ewan is HUNG.

I can't think of a better place to get a raging boner than an art exhibit. It makes a powerful statement about your sense of aesthetic. If you got a hard-on at, say, a monster truck rally, well THEN i'd be worried.

Makes one glad to be a girl. I can be horny as fuck in public and as long as I don't soak right through my jeans it's totally undetectable.

Jen said...

Fwiw, so long as one isn't condescending about it, I don't think it's ever rude to ask if someone needs help if it looks to you like they're struggling, whether or not they seem to have a disability. If someone gets annoyed by the offer, then a quick, "My apologies, I didn't mean any offense," should wrap it up neatly for anyone who isn't an asshole.

YMMV, of course, but this is the ethic I carry around about it and it works for me.

Michael said...

::adds Pillowbook to Wishlist::

You should see his body, y'all. Stunning instrument.

CB, girls are so lucky. You can get off stealthy, too. You made me feel better about it. Next I wanna get wood in the Prado.

Jen, I knew I could count on you. Isn't it always the way that the simplest, most common sense and courteous way is the right way? Why do I get so hung up on rules? What's YMMV?

Oh, and that avatar is SPOT ON. !!!

Jen said...

ymmv = your mileage may vary

I love my new avatar! I got it from here.

Michael said...

Perfect.

Now, how do you put links in the comments?

Michael said...

RE: avatar

It's kinda freakin' me out, actually. It's the POINT, I realize, but it's virtually you.

Jen said...

link recipe:

[a href="http://url"]describe your link here[/a]

Copy the web address from your browser and paste it in between the quote marks where shown. Describe your link where it says to. Replace the brackets with the greater than/lesser than signs and then preview to make sure it works.

If you want to see an example of how it looks when it's hot, highlight the link in my comment, right-click, choose "view selection source", and a little window will pop up and show you the html.

Michael said...

Oh dear.

Michael said...

ME!

The Other Andrew said...

Jeezalou, I consider myself html challenged.... but really. What is it where you are, 1993? Dude, like RTFM. :)

BTW - IMHO, nothing says you care like wood, so boner up boys. LOL. ROFLMAO.

Michael said...

I have no manual. (And I just googled RTFM to even get the reference) I graduated high school in 1983 having taken one computer class (programming in BASIC) and never looked back. I'm SCIENCE BOY (and proud of it!) and can name every bone, tendon and vessel in your wee body, lover, but I don't know HTML from shinola.

The Other Andrew said...

Phalanges! I remember that much from human physiology...

I graduated High School in 1981, so SUCK IT. :) The only computing I did in high school, and I kid you not, involved colouring in sections on punch cards that were then sent away. A week (or two) later and Hey Presto! you got back a crappy dot matrix printed picture/calendar made up of asterisks, ones and noughts. I'm ancient!

Bodhi said...

Being the big flamer that I am, of course I am going to tackle the boner in the art venue question. Well, at least tackle in a hopelessly nelly kinda way. One where hopefully I might land on aforementioned hotness with aforementioned boner ... but I digress.

Yes, sweetie, of course its fine to have a big old boner in an art venue. Brad only knows, moi in speaking with experience here. Last time it occurred, I was with the ever lovely Q60's girl at the Art Gallery of NSW when a twinkish Brad-Pitt lookalike with a French accent (ooh la la) took my eye. Talk about art. He was something I will definately wanted to add to my personal collection. Hmmmm. A hung twink ... say no more ...

Suffice to say, sweetie, raging you know what.

In fact, I've had more than just a boner in the art gallery. If I remember correctly, his name was Jason ... we also had said relations in the State Library as well. But thats another story.

Ciao!