Tuesday, May 02, 2006

I have no proof, but I think that I'm right

So, I went to see Kathy Griffin on Sunday night. People, she is a scream. You know that already. Given her ubiquity on Bravo, I was wondering if it would be worth it to see her live. So worth it. She hit all the usual suspects (Cruise, Mariah, Whitney, Seacrest, Gaiken), telling tales out of school, but I'm telling you that some of her most enjoyable stuff (for me) was political. She is just a few weeks back from Iraq and lawd have mercy does she have stories from there. That's not even the best shit. The best shit is when she goes OFF on the Bushies. Now understand that this is Dayton, Ohio, kids. Liberal outpost? Nein. Conservative bastion? Ja. I was surprised that the crowd received some of this stuff so well, but any surprise was tempered by the observation that I've never seen so many same sex couples in one place outside of Holz. And grrrrrl, she knows the crowd she's drawing. Caters to them/us. She has a list of things you'll never hear a gay man say, how to tell a regular lie from a gay lie, and she might even call someone a sloppy bottom, and it ain't Morley Safer. Her new special, Strong Black Woman, airs on Bravo next Tuesday. Oh, one local moment happened when Kathy asked if there was a "Maude" in the house and a man's voice shouts out, "Yes!" She was all, "Maude from my message boards?" and he's, "Yes!". "Huh. Maude's a man." She's trying to get the message boards going on her website, but right now it's mostly just fags hooking up.

It's nights like that one that serve to reinforce my notion that I'm in the wrong place. Sometimes I convince myself that "gay" is just a part of me. That I'm fine here. Then I'm in a huge venue with people that are either just like me or accepting of people just like me, and it's overwhelming. I'm not using that word lightly. Knees weak overwhelming. I know this sounds crazy for a man my age to say. We all walk our own path, though. It's been months and months that I've been talking about it, but I have this strong feeling that's like waking up. But long sleep refreshed, not drowsy. Or like I'm really seeing things, eyes wide open. Don't worry, though, I'm not all freakish with a nictitating membrane or anything. Just the huge forehead. My cards are all out on the table. Anyway, there's a peace and an exhiliration to it. Like I said, maybe you don't get that, but the other cool thing is that I'm fine with people not getting it or thinking "What took you so long?" or whatever. I've spent so much of my life worrying about pleasing people and worrying about what people will think. I'm done. Some of you reached that point at 20, some at 40, some never. No other path. No regrets. Ummmmm...thanks for listening.


freakgirl said...

You should BURN IN HELL for making me click that membrane link. Jeezy creezy.

I'm dying to see Kathy's new special, but I'm also a bit hesitant. I'm going to see her in June and I sort of want it to be fresh, you know? Oh, I'll probably watch it anyway.

Michael Guy said...

Sounds like a divoon evening, Michael. That's sorta how I feel when I'm in Palm Springs, like I am finally 'home' or something. The town is 45% gay with a gay mayor. It seems I leave a bit more of my heart there every time I return to Chicago. And who doesn't want to escape mid-west winters?! The BF said 'in ten years'...I said I can't/won't wait that long.

And that 'what took you so long?' feeling? A re-awakening? Sometimes that happens at 50, too. You better roll out the red carpet, cuz here I come. I missed out on a lot in my twenties. I am making up for lost time.

The Other Andrew said...

Stand in your truth, bitch.

Whatever that means... :)

Bodhi said...

And speaking of scream ...

The last time we went to one of my local gay pubs (The Newtown) a few weeks back to catch a drag show, we were all sitting near the stage entry. We inevitably met one of the performing drag queens who was immediately impressed by Rabbit (whispering in my ear 'he's fucking gorgeous!'). We all then had a laugh about our straight friend Leanne, who is very tall and very blonde, and how with a little additional makeup she would make a great drag queen. He took one look at Rabbit and said, 'I don't know about that, but give me half an hour with that boy and I could make him beautiful', then kissing him on the cheek.

Da Bunny and I caught up last night and we were both having a laught about this incident. He told me if he ever was to be a drag queen, he has decided upon the name of Amanda.

Amanda Hugandkiss.

Funny Bunny.

Oh, so it was a very tenous link. Huh, as if that has ever stopped me before ...

Michael said...

FG, I didn't see that chicken picture when I first linked to the def. Yikes! Sowwy. I know what you mean about spoiling the live show, so I tried not to include any punch lines in my lil' recap.

Road trip! Can I cue up the Wicked soundtrack?

Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I'm through with playing by the rules
Of someone else's game
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts
Close my eyes: and leap!

It's time to try
Defying gravity
I think I'll try
Defying gravity
And you can't pull me down!

Andrew, dude, it's been my mission since FG offered up that chestnut. I've had to scrape my truth out of my shoes a few times just so I wouldn't slip around so much. I know that, as always, you got my back, darling.

Michael said...

Bodhi, I HANG on your tenuous threads. Never more so than when they are Rabbit-based. Part of me standing in my truth will be to, one day, have him sitting in my lap.

Michael Guy said...

MICHAEL: You know...when all else fails--come up with a showtune. You get snaps for that. And ANDREW: please stop making me pee myself; "stand in your truth bitch!??" What if I just peed in my truth from laughter!

The Other Andrew said...

Mikey, Bodhi would cut you - just so you know. Oh, and I adore the stench of truth, don't you?

MG, after all the laughs you've given me sweetums, glad I could return the favour.

Bodhi said...

Run rabbit, run rabbit, run run run
Don't give dat Mikey his fun, fun, fun ...

[secretly mumbling Mine! my precioussssssss]

Beau RN said...

Holy shit. I just realized I was supposed to be back in Dayton last weekend and we were trying to get hooked into her show. I thought how strange that I have to travel from NYC all the way back to my hometown to catch her. Sounds like a missed an awesome show.

maudecolumbus said...

Hey..... this is Maude from the Dayton show!!! I was shocked to see your mention of me in your blog........ I feel so..... IMPORTANT! I can't tell you how cool it felt when Kathy yelled out to me during the show. I was SOOOOOOO glad I had two friends with me so that I had proof she did it. Then, after the show, my mobile rings. The number was blocked. I answered. It was a different friend. I hadn't known she was at the show that night. The first thing out of her mouth was "What the fuck is Kathy Griffin doing yelling at you during her show?" Maybe I am a D-list fag! smile

I am really trying to get together a TV viewing party for when Kathy's 2nd series starts in June. If you know of any cool peeps in Columbus, please tell them to contact me. I am a bit newish to the area and haven't made many friends yet.

Anyway..... enjoyed your page... Let me know if you come over to Columbus sometime!

Maude (a.k.a. Tony)

Michael said...

beau rn, it was a great show. Maybe you'll have to come back for Margaret Cho. ::makes the "call me" hand gesture::

Maude, that was a cute, cute moment. If KG talked right to me, I'd be PLOTZING. Mazel tov. D-List viewing party sounds fun. AND Strong Black Woman tonight!

Beau RN said...

I'll definitely give you a call, Cho or no. I'm back in Dayton on 6/6. Can you meet for a beer or some other civilized cocktail? How the hell does one e-mail you around this thing? rhagern@yahoo.com.

Let's be best girl-friends!