Sunday, May 14, 2006

A little voice inside my head said, "Don't look back. You can never look back."

I don't know, guys. Against my better judgment, I think I'm gonna be seen in these at some point. There's no actual age restriction printed on them, MPAA-style, but is there a commonly held guideline I should be made aware of? Or is it one of those "if you have to ask" deals that seem to thwart me at every turn?

19 comments:

Michael Guy said...

Hmmm. I dunno. I'd need to see you in them, first. And then see you out of them. Last. But seriously, I deduce you're taller than moi so you more than likely would look like a tall drink of water in those. I, on the other hand, would look like I'm one jug short of a washboard band. Yep. 5' 8" here.

Michael said...

Well, I am 6'1", but these would definitely have to be reserved for a vacation scenario only. No, not even then. It was just a wistful moment I had this morning. And yesterday when I tried them on. I even have a little problem with cargo shorts. They just struck me as so "grasping at my misspent youth". Is my attitude poor?

Michael Guy said...

Age is just a number, Michael. I think if one is in good shape physically and projects a youthful demeanor--mentally--to the world, why not wear what one damn well pleases?! Though admittedly I know that I cannot, ever--shop at Abercrombie & Fitch. First because I feel like grandpa walking in to one their stores and secondly, well--because I AM GRANDPA walking into one of their stores. Sux to be five-OH!

6' 1"...my, my, my.

Anonymous said...

I was hoping you were talking about the shoes, in which case I'd give a thumbs-up. But if it's the pants, well, take this from someone who thinks you're the bee's knees: man-capris work on no one. NO ONE. Like Vanilla Coke or marshmallows in Jello, it may seem like an interesting combo, but the XY chromosome and capri pants were never meant to mingle.

Michael said...

I'm with ya, MG, on the A&F boycott. I'm always a bit saddened by men of a certain age wearing their logo tees. So why am I not saddened by my own bad self in capris pants? Cuz it was mostly all in good fun. Mostly. They do seem breezy-romantic-stroll-on-the-beach appropriate, but probably best left to wistful imaginings... and women.

Max, I think you're keen, and of course you're right about the pedal pushers, but when it comes to judging shorts length, recent evidence suggests you might be on slightly shaky ground, darlin'.

Michael Guy said...

Just for the record--I'd not pass on the beach walk with you if you sported said 'capris.' Can I wear my pink POLO cargos? They so rock hard. But never see the light of day in Chicago...only PALM SPRINGS. Of course, PS has a 45% GAY population/gay Mayor. So I'm in grand company.

Bodhi said...

Hmmmmm. Methinks all you need to do is get them in camouflage (white/grey combo seems to be the cargo de jour) and you will not look outta place in Newtown. Every gay boy seems to be doing this look at the moment here. I suggest you match it up with some butch looking dogtags. Truly faaaaabulous, sweetie.

If you can ever manage to get his boardshorts off (hmmmmm ... ), Rabbit makes them look good. I'm sure they would be quite the hawtness on you too. Ya big stud.

Anonymous said...

I knew my preference for hoochie-shorts would come back to haunt me! We are truly creatures of extremes, you and I...

The Other Andrew said...

I could never do these. Short man + man capris = guy in palazzo pants.

Ugly.

(5' 4" here - one a good day)

The Other Andrew said...

One a? Urgh. On a good day, on a good day.

Michael Guy said...

ANDREW: But what about 'man capris' with your cork-wedge espadrilles? That should bump you to 5' 7" at least.

MAX: Define 'hootchie shorts' please. I think I may have a pair in a drawer somewhere. Are we talking cut-off jean shorts with a 1" crotch width?!

Anonymous said...

Oh Michael, No on the capri pants. Only acceptable in the instance where you are actually going from seaside to yacht. Otherwise, it's a no.

And, I say that with love. (dirty love)

Jen said...

No man-pris! ::whacks nose with rolled up paper::

Ooh Andrew, we're the same height -- too bad we're not on the same continent else we could play dress-up in each other's closets.

Anonymous said...

OMG, it's the 5'4'' club. HOLLA!

freakgirl said...

:: raises hand ::

The Other Andrew said...

We rule the world.

Dress-ups time!

savante said...

Ouch. Not even a major hottie could pull that off! Don't go there... step away from the pants!

paul

Michael said...

I'm SO getting them.

Michael Guy said...

MICHAEL: Good! I adore a man with convictions. Speaking of "convictions"...how's about a little prison-bitch fantasy? Yep.