Like a circle in a spiral, like a wheel within a wheel

I had a wonderful time in Michigan last weekend. I hit the road early because of the weather, but really wasn't slowed much, so I made it by 4P on Friday. My only plans were for the birthday party on Saturday night. Plenty of time for me to gambol about, as a coltish sprite like me is wont to do. Care to see a highlight reel?

• Second guessing myself on the gift I had for OtherMom, I headed for the upscale mall, which is so chic btw, that it's not a mall at all, but a 'collection'. Heh. Not surprisingly (to me), I ended up shopping for myself. I couldn't believe, given the hour and the proximity to Christmas, that the crowd was minimal. It was nice and relaxing to roam around and window shop and try stuff on. See, all you girls need your very own homo homey for this reason alone. I'll watch you try shit on for a very long time before I even think of getting restless. Some other folks seemed a bit stressed, though, like the parents waiting in line with toddlers in tow for pictures with Santa. One little boy in his mini-Santa suit had a particularly furrow-browed DILF behind him. I decided to intervene and commented about how freakin' adorable the boy was and what a great memory this would be for them both. The DILF just lit up. Beamed. Stress lines vanished. It's Christmas, y'all!
• I worked out later. I usually hit the gym when I'm up there. This time I was a little bored and unmotivated. Then I saw Gaylord. Tall. Fucking BUILT. Bangin' ass. Black as coal. Total homo. I gathered he was a personal trainer, so I asked him to take me on with no appointment. It's the end of the day + I'll pay him under the table = He obliged. Me under the table, paying. Unnnhhh. Damn, I've never worked so hard. Was he that tough or was I just that desperate to please him? I can smell him still. Anyway, the gym was closing and we were in the locker room after. I couldn't help but stare at his ass. Would you believe he noticed and then let me hold it? The tip was generous.
• I spent a fair amount of time regretting that I came off as some kind of apologist for Ford over at freakgirl.com. I asked a few questions about what we should expect of a corporation. Upon further reflection, I think that we SHOULD expect companies to put civil rights ahead of fiscal concerns. That's why I like her joint. So very funny most of the time, but then suddenly, I learn something! If she posted more photos of hot guys, it'd be damn near perfect over there.
• Mom2 ended up LOVING her gift (a hand-thrown teapot with all her FAVE colors). Well, I'm guessing she loved it given that when we left the restaurant she frenched me a little. I know what you're thinking. Gross! Before you judge though, you should know that she's got a tight lil' chassis for a 65 year old. And a mom. What? She's not my real mom.

What else? Oh, I could go on. I love my family up there. The rest of the weekend was talking over coffee and breakfast, talking over lunch, talking over dinner, talking while we drove places, talking in the sauna. These Jews love to talk. About THINGS. REAL THINGS. I think I was switched at birth and should have been with them all along. One more thing. In this little recap, there's one lie. Care to guess?