Friday, September 30, 2005

Well, I found a road and off I sped, I met a man with no little toe and a real big head

I'm heading north on the highway to Michigan for that party I keep yammering about. Michigan is a blue state btw. I know, I know, you are WAY over all the blue state/red state shenanigans, but I like to haul out dusty ol' shit from the attic and sit cross-legged on the floor and reminisce. Michigan is blue because of the auto workers, though. The unions love their Democrats. The Michiganders aren't blue because they cotton to man on man action. They are all about the constitutional amendments to restrict basic human rights of the queers. Why dost thou forsake me, Wolverine? God knows I love you seven ways to Tuesday. Claw me with those knife-hands, bitch.
Well, that was a tangent I didn't expect. Where was I? I did last minute shopping a few days ago for another friend, recently 40, who I'll bump into this weekend. She's under the mistaken impression that she means as much to me as the present day birthday girl. Rather than disavow her of this delusion, I picked up a Shuffle and loaded it up with Maxity goodness. Now try and tell me you wouldn't want me buying you presents. That's good shit people! Did I just say so myself?
Will you permit me a small rant? I'm not fussy interpersonally with language or grammar. It's not so much because things don't bother me, it's that I know if I fuss, it'll come back to bite me in the ass. There's this one thing, though. Can we all just pause for a moment and phonetically sound out how to pronounce "Alzheimer's"? Yes? It seems that there are a dozen variants people try on for size, and they usually kinda whisper over it because they're fairly certain they aren't getting it right. Is that you? Well, you aren't getting it right if it comes out like "Old Timers". It's 'älts-"hI-m&rz. Let's say it together aloud. Very good. Thanks for humoring me. Comment me about words that drive you crazy, if you are so disposed.
Have a great weekend, y'all!

ADDED: Who is seeing Serenity this weekend? I have my proto-nephew FIRED UP to check it out. The thing is, I have to bust him out of Chinese school on Saturday afternoon to see the matinee. Just because it will be against his mother's wishes, is that considered an abduction in a court of law?

11 comments:

savante said...

Omigod! I never even realized that. Hell, I'm just gonna break out laughing now each time some one says that word in the hospital!

Paul

Michael said...

You know how people will swallow the word when they think they aren't pronouncing it right? Just wait. You'll hear it.

The Other Andrew said...

As a person who can sprenchen sie Deutsch, I always pronounce authentic Kraut style. What always makes me smile though is when people mangle expresions, like when 'for all intents and purposes' comes out 'for all intensive purposes'...

Saw Serenity last night! It's fast, furious, dark, light... I can't post too much with spoilering you. I have to see it again to sort out my feelings about it. It explains River etc well, and all of a sudden a shirtless Simon is hot - who knew?

The Other Andrew said...

'sprenchen'? Ach du liebe Gott!

Sprechen! That should be 'sprechen sie Deutsch'...

freakgirl said...

I say, "ALLZ-heimers." Oops. I'm sorry.

Don't get me started on people who say "supposably" or "for all intensive purposes." And god save you if you ever say "let's run it up the flagpole and see who salutes" to me in any context (unless you're talking dirty).

WE ARE SEEING SERENITY TONIGHT! An entire freak n geek parade of us.

The Other Andrew said...

Enjoy Serenity!

Oh, and 'eggcetera' instead of etcetera... that's a killer too!

wingedman said...

God I hated Chinese school on saturday and I'm fucking Chinese. I don't know why, I just hated how everything looked and sounded alien.

To this day I'm considered a banana--yellow on the outside, white on the inside.

Michael said...

I heart bananas.
I hadn't heard that expression. Well, two of my favorite people are bananas, then. Since their parents are divorced, their red-headed, freckled father and I are often seen out and about doing things together with them. Be it skiing, shopping or crossing international borders, we always get that quizzical look and then dawning recognition from folks. Like, "Oh, these two life partners must have adopted the Chinese children." I kinda like it. He kinda doesn't.

Michael said...

I saw "Serenity", too! Saturday afternoon. How MUCH did we LOVE it, y'all? I never do this, but I'm seeing it again.

The Other Andrew said...

Hello?! Is this thing on?....

I've been obsessively checking for new posts all day today... so take 10% off the top of your hit counter, m'kay? That was just me.

Michael said...

I think it's the first Monday I've been remiss I've not driven at least one post hole. Explanation forthwith.

I don't have a hit counter. Do I?