Tuesday, September 20, 2005

It ain't me, it ain't me, I ain't no senator's son

The bean curd was excellent and the fortune was flattering.

Your heart is pure and your mind is clear.

If only.

13 comments:

Will said...

Amazing that no Chinese outside of the U.S. has ever heard of the fortune cookie tradition.

Michael said...

Yeah, that and most of the food is totally different as well. One of my best friends grew up in Taiwan and she keeps promising me that we'll go there and to a few spots in China. She always says the food you can get from street vendors in Taiwan is better than anything you'll get in Chinese restaurants in the U.S. Also, she has the most adorable pouty face when dancing that you just have to see.

Anonymous said...

You know the thing about putting "in the bed" at the end of your fortune, right?

Michael said...

I've never heard of that Sara! Sounds funny.

freakgirl said...

I can't believe you've never heard of that. Did you grow up in a cave? :)

Michael said...

Dude, RURAL OHIO.

Will said...

freakgirl: Of course I know what it is. The tv shows nothing but american shows, it's amazing half the world doesn't grow up with an american accent.

I actually got to eat some chinese food while I was at san francisco, and it's really not too bad, just that the portions are GINORMOUS, and it's a little bit more fusion but otherwise authentic. I've personally eaten street hawker food in Taipei myself and let me tell you it's not all that either *sniffs* unless you love curdled pig's blood and jellied intestines and fun stuff like that.

Michael said...

That's probably why my "Precious Little Flower with the Glistening Dewdrop" loves it. She gobbles that kinda shit up. In Chinatown (NY) once, she and her sister almost came to blows over who got to eat the fish's eyes.

Jen said...

One of the many sophomoric yet still amusing American cultural traditions we have is to take the fortune out of the cookie and whatever it says, append the text "in bed" to the end of it. Thus one will receive fortunes such as "Beautiful things await you -- in bed" and "Your hard work will be rewarded -- in bed". Which clearly greatly improve the quality of said fortunes.

Michael said...

I think it might also be fun to use "on all fours" as the appendage.

Bodhi said...

I heart fortune cookies, but every time I read one it seems to say the same damn thing everytime:

This paper is protected by a platic coating

Do you think they are trying to tell me something?

Will said...

This paper is protected by a plastic coating - on all fours

Does it seem wrong that it actually sounds pseudo-kinky?

Michael said...

Does it seem wrong to ME? Dude, have you read my blog? It's all DIRTY, my brotha...on all 4's. Unnh.